Yesterday I spent the day with my friend

We have been best friends for 37 years

I really want to cancel on her because I was just f**** u

And I didn't, because I have not seen her for a while

I have terrible sensitivities to medication

They don't work correctly on me

My doctor is doing a cheek swab on me.So we can find what medications work for me

He is finally decided.It is time for genetic testing on me

Going back to yesterday

I was in some pain so I took my fibro medication that I take at night

I'm allowed to take this medication twice a day.But I take it at night because it makes me sleepy

I did not know I was in this world

I was dizzy

I could not see

I could not walk

But I went out with my friend, and we went shopping, and she helped me.And we went out to eat, and slowly, I came back to myself

When I came home, I took a nap

And I slept 7 hours

When I woke up, I thought it was daytime

And I was talking with a friend

And I thought it was daytime

We were talking privately.And then he told me it was nighttime he is also on eastern standard

I got scared

And I threw that medication in the garbage

And then my curi found me and we talk, work some problems through

But I didn't want to scare him and let him know what was going on with me

I have stopped two medications very recently

I was put on both these medications.Around october

October is around when things started imploding on me

My brother and I were extremely mean to each other

I started shopping for myself for christmas for my apartment

My friends started telling me what a dirtbag and a d****My online boyfriend was at the time

And I wouldn't listen

And I ignored things that were right in front of my eyes

This morning, as my brain straightened out from not being on that medication

I've done some research

Both medications affect concentration, memory and decision-making skills

While these medications separately do not cause impulsivity issues

These medications taken together can cause impulsivity issues

Well I was f**** u

From october till january

I was f**** u bad

And now I know why

It was the medication

I'm sure my brother did not help

In january I went off the Cymbalta because all I was doing was sleeping at.Odd times and I was staying sleepy, and I felt drugged

The very next day, I quit taking that medication.I woke up and felt less drugg

However, I was still taking them the lyrica at bedtime

And I was still feeling dizzy.I thought it was my blood pressure running

I was having balance issues, which I thought was also my blood pressure

Concentration issues, memory issues and able to make decision issues.

I was having impulsivity issues

It was the medication

I'm no longer taking either of them

I'm so sorry for all the s***I put my friends through

Because of this

And you were right, he is a dirtbag and a
d****

Now so many pieces that were missing in my mind.All makes sense

Why I wasn't paying attention to my friends

Wow I was having impulsivity issues

Why I was having concentration issues

Why I was having memory issues

Why I was staying sleepy all the time and not resting

Why I was crying at the drop of a hat

Why my brother and I were fighting so much

I'm so happy that you stuck with me

I love you all so much

You know who you are, my friends and you're the best

And i'm so glad that I did not f*** things up with my new guy

Curi i want this and I want you

Penny